I’m just an old robotic human being, therefore I must be a culprit too.
It’s okay sir/madam, no issues.
Shall we move on to our discussion on “Dialouge”?
For me, the most important important aspect of dialogue is human relationship happening in the moment between the participants. Whatever topic is being discussed, what is happening between us as we discuss it? Asking questions of each other for clarification and understanding, reporting reactions, saying genuinely how I feel. Are we making observations as this is going on?
It seems, that we must maintain the balance in our conversations. While talking about the unknown and keeping the emotions intact. Tell me if I am wrong
I do not quite get it. What do you mean by “keeping the balance in our conversation”.
What kind of balance are you referring to?
Hi, I had a conclusion that we are emotional and emotions will affect our perception to unknown.
I could be wrong also, anyways 
When you say that we are emotional beings ,inevitably, these emotions will color our responses, our actions, our way of living. It seems to me that we have so many emotions which we try to control most of the time.
Can we learn sthg via our emotions? We are so eager to name every emotion that wells up and we think that by naming we come in contact with it. But is it actually so?
Take f.i fear. Thousands books have been written by psychologists, etc … and fear has become so complex in order to put a layer upon it so that it has become hidden.
At least that what we think
Alas fear always seeks its way out and will eventually do what it has been doing for centuries on end.
Unless we have the courage, the guts to face it to come eye in eye with it and deawith it.
Does it mean that I have no fear? I cannot answer this question. The only sensible thing i can say is that i am determined to get an answer.
.
This attitude is the problem, isn’t it?
I must be a hero, a fearless opponent of evil, make decisions, take a stand, and all the rest of it. Why can’t I just be honest and acknowledge how confused and conflicted I am? Why can’t I just remain with the incoherent thinking I mindlessly generate?
Instead of prodding myself to do what I cannot do, why don’t I take an interest in my thoughts, reactions, behavior, and learn about the human condition directly, immediately, instead of pretending I can solve the problem I am?
Let me assure you that it is not a problem to me (it seems more like a problem for you, which is regrettable, especially in this confined place of Kinfonet).
On the contrary, if I may add, it gives me a kind of energy to go on.
Of course not…and that’s the problem.
On the contrary, if I may add, it gives me a kind of energy to go on.
To go on with the illusion that the problem can solve the problem.
We watch films, as we want emotional stimulus for many different reasons. I think depending on the genre of film, the nature of emotions will vary.
I thought (and i seem to remember that we have had this issue before) that we are here and now to inquire into our thoughts and if possible to bring about sthg new.
However we (or better you) seem to react on whatever i might say as a bull in a china shop.
Hope I am wrong about it.
@sivaram
This last reply was meant for @Inquiry
And i regret it was personal.
But to go into our inquiry about emotions.
Indeed, we tend to watch these movies and sometimes we got even sentimental about them and loathe ourselves therefore.
Sentimental is considered as “false” emotions, but what then are “real” emotions.
Do they exist at all or are they just a reaction upon past experiences?
For me a difficult aspect of dialogue is how to report when I’m having a reaction about someone expressing what they see in another person in an accusatory tone, without being accusatory myself! How can that be done? Is there a way to express it un-reactively? when I’m actually feeling reactive?
If someone says something that I react to by feeling offended, does the way I say it matter as to how both you and I experience it? For example, I’m feeling accused versus you’re accusing me. This is not to say you’re not accusing me. Maybe you are. But by probing into it, would it be possible for us to see what’s actually going on? This is about probing the reaction in a way that both another and I can hear it. Back to the example: I feeling accused by what you just said. This is the way I took it. Is that what you meant?
That’s different than accusing you back.
Even if it was intended as an accusation I have discovered it feels a lot better stay with it and be able to say something like: Thank you for clarifying that you did intend to accuse me. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t mis-interpretting what you said. Now I’d like to understand why you said it. Are you able to say something about what you’re accusing me of… and so on.
This may sound idealistic but I don’t care. I’m just asking if it could be possible to change the quality of an aggressive communication, rather than specifically how it’s done. For me, this is hard to do when the reaction is alive in the fullest intensity, sometimes impossible. So in that intensity maybe it’s better to remain silent and watch how things play out. But being able to stay with it in some way or another seems to change everything.
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“Words Are Windows (or They’re Walls)
I feel so sentenced by your words,
I feel so judged and sent away,
Before I go I’ve got to know,
Is that what you mean to say?
Before I rise to my defense,
Before I speak in hurt or fear,
Before I build that wall of words,
Tell me, did I really hear?
Words are windows, or they’re walls,
They sentence us, or set us free.
When I speak and when I hear,
Let the love light shine through me.
There are things I need to say,
Things that mean so much to me,
If my words don’t make me clear,
Will you help me to be free?
If I seemed to put you down,
If you felt I didn’t care,
Try to listen through my words,
To the feelings that we share.
-–Ruth Bebermeyer”
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Will you help me to be free? To the feelings that we share.
I feel that the 2nd part of the poem can be read as a reply to the first.
I must say that, I have some family sentiments but while watching the film, my judgment of “It is just a film” will reduce the intensity of sensations inside me.
This question appears difficult to me and I don’t know why
Thanks for letting me know that I need to be more mindful of your fragility.
Sometimes it’s better to acknowledge your reactive conditioned response to the offended party to take the sting out of it, and sometimes, as you say, " it’s better to remain silent and watch how things play out".
@inquiry aren’t we all more or less fragile? But … thx anyway for your response and for your openess …