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How to deal with anger provoking situations?

In the work environment, some times things happen between people due to comparison and other sorts of things. I think this is a very important aspect to investigate, as one may face these situations in life.

This kind of activity may create images inside the mind after the situations happen. How do deal with those kinds of things?

If someone knows please share some of your thoughts on this kind of topic.

It happens. The way I dealt with it is what happened. There is no way to deal with it later. It is what happens. Then I am upset, annoyed disappointed, with myself. I want to be a better person. I can then look more deeply into all this, and try to find out why I act this way. It is a self-examination. But don’t stop there, and see it is this habit of comparison, competition, desire, etc, all of that. So there is no answer in general, because that is the society we live in. It is a question of discipline. Not the discipline of self improvement, but the discipline of seeing I am acting with conditioning, that is it is a reaction. Looking more carefully, I can see what it is I am reacting to. This seeing, is the action that is not reacting.

@Peter
Yes sir, as you said it happens in everyone’s life. Based on the mood of the mind, I observed images are appearing in patterns. If there is attention inside then the reaction will not occur but sometimes reactions are happening and therefore the chattering.

I got the partial solution with partial attention inside my mind. My problem is that I am not able to be attentive all the time.

How to remain in an attentive state?

We react to the way others regard us, be it favorably or unfavorably, because we believe we exist as separate entities that can be judged as such. Because we’re not aware of how intricately related and interdependent we are, we form images of ourselves and others, creating a narrative about what is happening and who is doing what.

There is no true relationship between image-forming individuals. Each one just serves the other’s need to be somebody; each one is a character in its own drama.

But until one sees this, one can only react to the other’s approval or disapproval, support or criticism, and one’s reactions will be anger, bemusement, or satisfaction. When one sees all this there is no reaction because it’s all madness, wishful and harmful thinking.

@ Inquiry

I agree with your’s and @peter response to my question, both are converging on the same point.

How do we make understand this complex phenomenon to other family members or friends who are self-centered as a part of our society?

I think this is a serious question to make our friends to family members understand.

If you were not self-centered you wouldn’t ask because you’d be a living demonstration of a human who is not self-centered, which is all anyone can do.

@Inquiry

I have to think about what you said, I have to figure out actually what I am.

Thanks for sharing your insights

You can’t “figure out” what you are. “You” are already a figure of your imagination. You can only watch what you think and do, including your reactions to what you think and do.

@Inquiry
As you said, I am watching those images, reactions, and actions in my daily life. Based on my actions, I figured out there is a lot of mix in the character over a period time. I can say before listening and after listening to Krishnamurthy there is a change in my consciousness but the self is still same.

The origin of self centered activity is coming from the roots of pride. I think, I cannot avoid or differentiate this characteristic but my question is,

Is it possible to make others understand about this nature of mind, with whom I live in daily life?

Ordinarily we share an insanity. With that understood, other than the practical day to day comments, there would not be much more to say. Some people may want to talk about this insanity, but we think of it as an experience, in parts, and don’t see the whole condition. The brain is working verbally, and with images, psychologically, and these are what we use to think. So if you are aware of this basic condition, you may be able to see the mistakes clearly. But trying to make this a topic of conversation, it would probably be with someone who is interested in all this, and not just someone in your ordinary circle of family and friends who just want to get on with their lives. On the other hand, integrated with the world, there may be some kind of organic confluence and this reaches others, I don’t know.

Do you “understand about this nature of mind”? If you do, your very existence is helping others.

@Inquiry
I understood that you are talking about virtue in behavior. Thanks for sharing your thoughts in this thread.

@Peter
Sir, I have an interest in investigating what I face in daily life and the nature of mind too. That is the reason, I have started this topic for conversation. I hope you got the reason why I started talking.

I do not know a lot of things happening inside my mind exactly.

You’re making an assumption. I never said or implied anything about virtue.

@Inquiry

Then what you said?

I think, by questioning itself I can understand what you want to say :slight_smile:

"How to deal with anger provoking situations? "
I think anger is the most common problem of man after fear.
The only thing that can prevent anger to explode is intelligence. Thought can’t end anger or violence.

@Incognito

  1. My understanding of intelligence is applying knowledge for solving problems in real life.
  2. I think I do not have knowledge in exploding that anger, that is the reason I asked this question.
  3. If you are able to explain in more simple terms, share your knowledge to us, such that brain will rewire again.

Then what you said?

Here’s what I said:

“Do you “understand about this nature of mind”? If you do, your very existence is helping others.”

@Inquiry

Why my existence will help others if I understand the nature of the mind?

Because you won’t be “you” anymore.