I don’t really care about that aspect. Let others handle / judge / determine that.
I’ve had the “Aha, I’m awareness!” epiphany a good number of times … but it never seems to stick. A day or two later it’s “Yep, I’m still awareness.” Then “I’m awareness, right?” Then “Awareness, me, oh reeeeeeeeeeally?” Then I reach for the remote and turn on the tv.
I think Drax had a good answer to this:
‘Problem’ as it appears to me is that you can ‘start’ to be aware but it soon fades. Then ‘you’ pick it up again and it fades again…K said something like you start but you break off in the middle, you don’t go all the way. As I recall.
So let it fade. But as K says the moment you are aware that it is fading/faded means again you are aware.
And that’s how it goes.
Once we get a hang of this, awareness becomes deeper and more abiding .
It’s like you are falling asleep. Can’t avoid that. But the moment you realise that you are falling asleep means you are awake again.
Drax reminded me that awareness isn’t ‘mine’.
Yes, that’s helpful, thanks Dan and Drax!
But you are material. An illusion is a creation of thought which (as Krishnamurti said) is a material process. When you watch a movie you’re watching an illusion, be it a rapid succession of still photographs or pixels that you attribute meaning to. Likewise, the illusion of self.
With your illusions, you’re the center of the universe. Without your illusions, you are nothing but what-is.
Be aware of the one that is having the epiphany. Be aware of the one who is losing the epiphany. Be aware of the one who lost the epiphany…
Been thinking more about the notion of nurturing an ego into a kinder, gentler, more intelligent form of itself.
I definitely think it’s possible, many people (egos) mature into decent and intelligent human beings. But, the ego has been in development for millions of years, and it’s extraordinarily effective at accomplishing its mission: to safeguard its power, dominion, and well being. Any attempt to tinker with the ego’s reflexes and mechanisms is going to be met with almost insurmountable resistance by the ego. Sneaky resistance too, hard to spot, hitting below the belt.
Isn’t the problem as you pose it here , that ‘you’ are separate from that which you want to reform? Is that the case or is this just thought thinking about becoming ‘better’? Not technically but becoming a better human?
Yes, I’m looking at it from a subject/object point of view, the subject I is thinking about how it might change the object I. On the neurological level, the brain probably assigns the function of subject to a certain cluster of neurons, and these neurons observe and act on the brain as subject. The human brain is perfectly capable of doing this kind of meta self-observation. Important to remember of course is that the results of the observation are both limited and skewed by the conditioning of the brain that is observing.
So the K point about the subject is the object (observer is the observed) is being dismissed. That’s fine but why here are you doing that?
I suspect that I don’t know what you’re talking about unless it’s just self-improvement.
Fair question, brother. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from Krishnamurti, it’s not to take the word of anyone. To me this applies to Krishnamurti, other non-dual traditions, and of course myself. I keep digging, unearth a lot of dirt and perhaps a few gems, the process is never-ending.