Is connection or connectedness something which is required to be made by something else, or just what is when there is not that which is disconnect? And given self is the factor of disconnect, and the question is then put, can I see myself in its entirety and in doing so end it, there is then this thing of only being willing to look at it, if I am promised an end to it. That means I have to look at it without any consideration that it can end, and since self is this disconnect, and this disconnect is in turn the fact of isolation, then it is only in looking at isolation with no prospect of ending it, that I can even begin to look at things, which is why this is so very difficult.
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So - as i said - to observe the whole movement of âIâ - we should also observe the conscious/sub-c./un-c., as a whole. Shall we discuss this a little deeper?
When i check out from a train, my body automatically walks to my house. Because of sub-conscious mind, in which this âwalkingâ is stored as a âmemoryâ - because of repeated action(i.e. habit). But, when i planned to go to my friendâs house, which is three miles from my house - this sub-conscious mind is of no use. Because, it again drives me to my home - and making me forget my new plan - then there arise âsufferingsâ due to waste of time - then mind becomes conscious - and i get to my friendâs house.
(See - as there is scientific discoveries - iâm distinguishing all this. If not, we can see the whole movement of âIâ without separating by scientifically found âtypesâ.)
Unconscious is a stage in which the brain is not at all conscuious of the feelings (i.e. pain,etcâŚ). So, if iâm not conscious, the un-conscious mind(which is of feelings) might take control of my mind. When my boss scolds me - there is an immediate reaction in form of âangerâ,etc⌠- itâs because the conscious, is not conscious, and so it(conscious mind) is taken control of un-conscious mind(in scientific terms).
So, from this - we âobserveâ that when the mind is not full of conscious, the sub-c. & un-c. brings only sufferings/pain/etcâŚ
The complication is what the conditioned mind is doing, thinking, with knowledge. Then we look to work it out within the conditioned mind. Isnât this obvious?
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âLookingâ & âworking it outâ are two different actions. To âwork it outâ the conditioned mind - creates another condition - yes itâs obvious.
But to âlook/observeâ the conditioned mind - we donât use another conditioned mind to look it. If we use another, then it is fragmented - then there is of no use, only further complications.
But if we âobserveâ the whole movement of âIâ (the conditioned mind) - there is no immediate response to find a solution and work it out. Just âobservationâ.
sounds like you are saying that we can choose âfreedom from the knownâ
choose??? 
If I decide that I want to observe (free from the conditioned mind) rather than see things as I usually do - can I do it?
No - Decision is another illusion. Decision is like - âthere is some suffering inside me - I decide now to observeâ, then âsufferings/pain/etcâŚâ goes on. If âHouse is on fireâ - will we decide to pour water?
Just âobservationâ as K said âwatching a tree - without describing or deciding or avoidingâ.
Why does the describing and deciding dissapear?
When we watch âAvengerâ Movie - we just observe itâs beauty second by second - right?
Until the movie ends, there only âobservationâ remains.
Likewise, when we observe the tree - we can just see the beauty of it without describing/deciding it. If we start to describe it (i.e. memory as âIâ spring up) as âBig/small/etcâŚâ - the very second we are getting distracted.
When we observe the âIâ - we can get into the root of it. But when we stop observe and describing/deciding, we cannot see the whole movement of âIâ.
So describing/deciding/etc⌠not disappears - it does not appears at all in âobservationâ
Obviously not. Litterature, visual art, theater, music, language etc are dependant on shared cultural knowledge - the screenwriters, directors etc know exactly what you are going to feel and think during each moment of the narrative.
When itâs seen that the movement of life is like a swift flowing river, and âdescribingâ, âdecidingâ is like an eddy circling round itself along the bank?
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Yes. All are dependent on it. I donât question it.
But when we go to a theatre - for that two hours - we donât think. We just âobserveâ the movie. Itâs beauty. Only after the end of movie, we compare it, describe it scene by scene,etcâŚ,etcâŚ
But those two hours - only âobservationâ
Likewise there is a beauty in tree/etc⌠If we stop âobservingâ - it means we are caught in the past(i.e. memories).
No judgement? For example, are we not aware of injustice, are we not wanting the good guys to win?
That justice is not cultivated while watching the movie. It was before watching the movie - we are conditioned as such - by watching trailers/other movies/etcâŚ
On those two hours - we only âobserveâ (I used especially avengers movie and not others)
Are you being serious/honest?
Why bother going to the movie then? You might have well have just observed a tree. - You went for an experience, and you did experience the whole gamut of self (fear, hope, injustice, joy, relief etc)
Yes Iâm being Honest. I just show to you what happens during âobservationâ.
There is no âwantâ for me to watch movies/picnic/friends/etc⌠and I donât say âI wonât come to movieâ to my relatives/friends/etc âwhen they ask me to join themâ⌠Because there is no good/bad from want/donât want.
I suffered for years due to pain (of a girl) and pleasure (from masturbation).
Only by sitting with K(while he inquires in videos) - a year back - I observe what happens in the world & in me.
Are you saying that watching a movie is a moment of meditation (choiceless awareness) for everybody - or just for certain people, like yourself?
No no no - âdesire to watchâ is the problem. These âdesires to watchâ arises to have a âpleasureâ for that two hours and be relieved from our day to day âsufferingsâ for a while.
Watching by âwantâ is the problem
For a guy like K - there is no want/dont want. If someone compels him to go to a movie - he goes, just sit silent, without expressing anything and only âobservingâ. But the friends wonât call him next time - as they get bored with this guy as he doesnât express pleasure/pain.
But if he called to have sex - he restricts it because it reduces the energy of body (like killing the body just for pleasure of âmeâ or âotherâ)
Are you saying that we should be insensitive, but at the same time ruled by fear ?